Noone must ever know
by Kez-o the Brave
Summary: Jack Spicer, Chase Young. non-yaoi. Jack's past haunts him, and what happens now that everyone knows what his darkest secret is? Will he be loathed, or worse; gain their pity? Angst. Torture/Non-con. Mature. Cussing. R&R. First XS. Be nice
1. Chapter 1

**No-one must ever know**

**Chapter 1**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the show Xiaolin showdown, even though this absurd obsession with it. And yeah, you've guessed it: Jack Spicer. **

**I can't help it, I love the little fool. :)**

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He looked at himself in the mirror, warily placing a finger on his tattooed make-up. Slowly as he stroked it, his mind was filled with painful memories.

He closed his eyes in pain.

Those had been the worst time of his life.

He didn't wish the same suffering upon anyone…

Not even his enemies.

_Not that I really have any "real" enemies…_

People could be so greedy, when it came to money… Power…

He opened his eyes again, looking at himself more closely in the mirror.

Starkly red hair, against pale skin.

Blood-red eyes…

Swirly goggles hanging around neck, for once.

Long black cape, hiding his frail body.

His eyes landed on his tattoo.

_Fucking tattoo…_

People maybe thought that he wanted it there, that he'd made it himself…

_I didn't get a choice…_

"_Make it look like he's crying!"_

But then again…

No-one had really ever asked…

No-one knew.

Why he hated clowns –

Why he hated the dark –

Why he always missed his mom…

And that was the way he wanted it.

No-one was ever going to find out about it.

It was too painful.

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He looked up, this mountain was huge!

He was so glad that he had his goggles. Without them, he wouldn't have seen anything in this goddamn rain.

He gasped in fear, as he almost lost the grip he had on the cliff, as a particularly big strike of lightning split a tree a few meters down.

_I've always hated lightning... And I can't even use my heli-pak when it's a thunderstorm outside. _

_And it's so dark… I hate the dark…_

_This sucks._

He heaved himself up on the cliff, laying there panting, sweeping his wet locks from his forehead and goggles.

_Let's just face it: I'm not made for climbing mountains._

"Jack Spicer! Prepare for a most humiliating defeat!"

He turned around, looking around in the air, searching for the Xiaolin monks and their flying dragon. Not seeing anyone, he looked down the cliff he was standing on.

As expected, there the four monks were, not even two meters behind.

_Oh God. The cheeseball never gets tiered of that one line, does he…?_

"Yeah yeah, whatever. I have evil to do, and I haven't got all day to do it. So hurry it up."

He sighed in frustration.

He'd lost all his Wu, and Wuya had left him. Chase had literary kicked his ass for being near his lair… And the monks couldn't even let him get this one Wu, for once.

And so, he was in for more ass-kicking.

_Can't everyone just write me an ass-kicking-check or something? _

He bit his lips as he thought while he hurriedly climbed on.

He didn't even know what this Shen-gong-wu does.

He thought about it for a while, then turned his head towards the monks and shouted.

"Hey guys! What does this Shen-gong-wu do, exactly?!"

He squinted his eyes towards them, seeing if they had heard.

He was Clay's cowboy-hat rise, revealing a shaking Dojo.

"I-i-it reveals stuff!"

Jack blinked stupidly.

_Huh?_

"The enemies secrets and stuff! It's called "The Orb of Secrets!""

He blinked as he head Raimundo's shout.

_I never really expected them to answer when I asked… those guy's just are too gulli-_

He paused.

_Secrets…_

His blood ran cold.

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_I must get the Wu, I must get that Wu!_

The top was so close…

He was so tiered, not even the thunder could be heard over his own beating heart and exhausted breaths.

Not one inch of him was dry anymore, and he had long since lost the feeling in his arms and hands.

He felt the rain sting the scraps he'd gotten on his body, and felt it run down his neck, and under his coat.

It hurt when the hard rain mercilessly smattered upon his cold body.

His clothes felt like they weighed a ton, and his limbs was starting to give in.

It was so cold…

_I'm going to get so sick after this…_

He turned around, seeing that the monks had caught up, almost being beside him.

_Please for once, let me get this Wu…_

He couldn't let anyone know…

He held back his tears as he slowly reached for the Wu, not feeling, but seeing his hands connect with its round, shiny, silver surface.

His eyes widened as he saw a large hand touch the other side of the orb.

"Jack Spicer, I challenge you to a Xiaolin showdown!"

He painfully lifted his head and tiredly stared at the Xiaolin Dragon of Earth.

_I'm just so tiered…_

"I accept! Name your game, loser!"

"Xiaolin Showdown Truth! First one that lies fails! I wager the Lotus Twister!"

Jack winched.

He hated that game. And even worse, he didn't have any Wu.

"I will fight without Wu, since I don't have any left."

He saw the cowboy smirk at him, tipping his hat, as the mountain shook.

He almost lost his balance as a big red balloon formed under him, bringing him high up in the air.

He felt the rain smatter on his back as he steadied himself.

_I have to speak the truth all the time, or else I will fall to my death…_

He slowly took a breath of air, trying to calm himself down.

No Wu and almost no fighting skills, against a Xiaolin monk?

He was used to bad odds, but this was ridiculous!

TBC

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(Next Chappie's about: Flashbacks and the outcome of the showdown.)

**Hmm… Mjyeeees what will happen? **

**As you might see, this is a quickie, a not so well planned fic,  
**

**Sadly but true. :E**

**ORB OF SECRETS?! WHAT WAS I THINKING?! TTnTT **

**Haaah, I have such an evil plot, so you wouldn't even know!**

… **Okay maybe you will, it's quite obvious, really…**

**Anyhoo, I want cookies and reviews.**

**I crave for it:3 **

**Please?**

**// K**


	2. Chapter 2

**No-one must ever know**

**Chapter 2**

**Disclaimer: Don't own Xiaolin Showdown. I just have this weird obsession with Jack Spicer. :P**

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_Maybe it'll go well; Clay doesn't seem like the smartest in the group…_

He thought for a moment, trying to find an embarrassing question. His face split in a grin.

"I have wondered for a while now… Clay, are you gay?"

He looked at the cowboy's face, surprised to see a smile.

"Sorry to disappoint you, Spicer. I'm not."

The balloon showed "True".

"What, see something you like, varmint?"

Jack chuckled.

"No, not really cowboy. I'm not gay."

Again the balloon showed "True".

"WHAT?!"

Jack frowned as he heard Kimiko shriek.

"What! Do I look gay?! Stupid loser…"

_Okay, I maybe might look a teeny bit gay… Damn…_

He heard Kimiko and Raimundo whisper, while Omi jumped around asking what "gay" was.

He ignored them and focused on Clay.

"Do you hate someone?"

Jack smirked at the cowboy's grimace of concentration.

"Hate is such a big word. No. I don't "hate" no-one."

Jack's eyes widened at the boy's answer.

_Odd._

"Spicer. Are you afraid of the dark?"

He glared at the Earth Dragon's smirk under the brim of the hat.

_You already know that! Just rub more salt in my wounded pride, would you?!_

"Yes. Yes I am."

_Damn, that was hard to admit. Stupid cowboy…_

He cleared his throat, an embarrassed blush spreading across his features as he heard the monks laugh.

"Okay Cowboy, are you afraid of something else, then that monster of a woman, I brought forward with Shadow of Fear?"

Jack smirked. He could almost taste the victory.

"I'm afraid of… Loosing does dear to me. My friends. My family."

Jack sneered.

_I who really thought I would win it there. Damn._

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"Clay! CLAY! Ask him about his deepest darkest secret!"

Jack winched when he heard Omi's shout.

Feeling the blood leave his face, he looked at the cowboy as he thought about Omi's advice.

_Why didn't I think of that?!_

"Jack Spicer. What is you deepest, darkest secret?"

_Nononononononononono… Please don't ask me that!_

He shook his head furiously, feeling his whole body tremble.

He hugged his thin frame, trying to stop the trembling.

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**Flashback:**

_He'd been seven years old, on his way home from school. _

_Not that he liked school. Everyone was just mean to him there... It crushed his heart, going to that place, everyday._

_People were so stupid._

_He never realised that he was followed. _

_He didn't even stand a chance. _

_A hand over his mouth as he in panic tried to scream. _

_A weird smell, and then everything turned black._

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_When he'd woken up, his head hurt, and he couldn't move. _

"_Feeling like waking up now, squirt?"_

_He tried to scream, but all that came out was a muffles yelp._

_He was gagged. _

_He was tied around ankles and hands._

_In a small room._

_With three strange men dressed as clowns._

_He felt tears build in his eyes, but refusing to let them fall. _

"_You're not gonna scream, and be a good boy, right?"_

_He whimpered and nodded his head softly, as he stares in fear at the man, who had twisted the usually happy smile of a clown, to an angry nightmare._

_A second clown walked forward, carrying a knife, placing it on his face and swiftly cut through the gagging-cloth. _

_Jack whimpered yet again, never opening his mouth, and eyed the knife. _

_He gasped in fear as the man carrying it, quick as a snake, held it under his chin. _

_He couldn't help it his tears started to fall, and he began sobbing as the man leaned forward. _

_He could smell the man's foul breath as he whispered in his ear:_

"_If you don't wanna lose yer life, snotface, you better stay quiet and don't try to escape."_

"_Leave the kid alone, and just make the call damnit."_

_Jack slumped against the wall as the third man sneered at the man holding the knife. _

_The man snorted and took away the knife, and flicked it close, then tucked it in his pants. _

"_You make the goddamn call!"_

_The first man stepped between the two other men, as they began to argue._

"_I'll make the call, 'cause you two idiot's clearly cannot do shit."_

_Jack slowly tried to ease the shaking of his body, as he in fear stared, wide-eyed, at the men. _

_He saw as the third man took a phone and began dialling a number, then put on a strange devise on the phone._

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"_Is this the Spicer's residence?"_

_There was a pause. _

"_Ah, Mr Spicer, what a wonderful day it is, isn't it? Well, to cut things short; we've got your son, rich Mr Spicer. And I don't know, maybe 50 000 000 dollars is a fair price for the snivelling brat?"_

"_Ah yes, this is a kidnapping. Nothing gets past you, does it? You smart man."_

"_You want to speak to your son?"_

_Jack's eyes widened as he yet again began to cry. _

_The second man heaved him to his feet and dragged him to the phone._

"_Speak."_

_Jack sobbed as the phone was put to his ear. _

"_D-d-dad?"_

_The phone was jerked from his ear as the man took it back. The man holding him up unceremoniously dropped him to the floor._

_He coughed as dust from the floor filled his lungs. _

"_Ah yes. I think that's enough of chit-chat. You call the police, or if you don't pay the money… Well, what can I say… I have one crazy guy with a knife, and another that's a child molester. It's your choice, Mr Spicer. I will call you later for further information. Have a wonderful evening."_

_The man ended the call, and stared at the wide-eyed and sobbing Jack on the floor._

"_Throw him in the dark-room."_

**End Flashback.**

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_Please no… don't ask this of me…_

"P..P-please…"

He felt tears gather in his eyes.

He sat down on the balloon, hugging his knees.

He didn't care about what the Xiaolin Dragons thought.

_There's nothing I can do… No matter what I do, they'll find out…_

He hid his eyes and emotions as he lowered his head and rested his forehead on his knees, softly sobbing.

"Please don't ask this of me…"

TBC

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**WAAAAAAH! **

**NOOOO!!!! JACKIE-POO! WHAT HAVE I DONE!?**

… **Why is it that even though I like the characters, this is how I express my love?**

**It's really quite disturbing… X(**

**I would really appreciate criticism. I'm trying to write better, but without your advice, it's quite hard. **

**COOKIES!**

**R&R! nwn**

**// K**


	3. Chapter 3

**No-one must ever know**

**Chapter 3**

**Disclaimer: Nope. Nope. Nope. I don't own Xiaolin Showdown, even though I REALLY want to.**

**A/N: Well, in this chapter I'll try to avoid typos and other errors… And sorry for making Jack cry. TTnTT**

**THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR REVIEWS! I love you guys:D**

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Clay looked at the shivering and sobbing teen in front of him.

He couldn't help but feel bad.

_I feel so stupid…_

He looked at his friends on the ground, desperately seeking help.

Seeing his friends as lost as him, to what to do in the current situation, he once again turned to look at the small form of Jack Spicer.

"Lotus Twister!"

He felt his limbs grow longer and gracefully jumped towards Spicer's balloon.

He softly landed on it, and his limbs grew back to their original form.

"Jack?"

He softly let the name fall from his mouth, but getting no reaction from the shivering form of his "so-called" enemy.

Gently he placed his hand on Jack's shoulder, surprised to find it so thin.

He felt the teen under his hand grow stiff.

"Jack? Are you okay, partner?"

He almost lost balance as the other boy quickly jerked away from him, bringing his tear-filled face in view, as his goggles slid down from his face, to rest around his neck.

Clay gulped at the fear he saw in those red eyes.

_That's no normal fear…_

"J-Jack?"

He saw the fear melt away from Jack's eyes.

"Please don't touch me…"

Clay heard Spicer's tiny whisper, as soft as the wind, and almost inaudible in the now softly falling rain.

He almost fell from the red balloon as the red-head quickly rose from his sitting position.

Once finding his balance, his eyes widened as he saw the teary and furious eyes of Jack Spicer.

"DON'T TOUCH ME! NEVER TOUCH ME!"

Jack Spicer's broken yell echoed in the rainy surroundings.

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**Flashback:**

_He banged his newly released hands upon the closed door._

"_Please let me out! I promise I won't cry! I won't make a sound!"_

_Little Jack's cries went unheard as he clung to the door in the pitch-black room. _

_He couldn't see his hands, he couldn't even see the door, but felt a doorknob in his tiny hand. _

_Tears streamed down his pale face as he, still sobbing, banged his fists on the door. _

"_P-PLEASE! LET ME OUT!"_

_He released the doorknob, and gripped his head, hurriedly curling into a ball on the floor._

_Never once did the tears stop falling from his face. _

**End of Flashback.**

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"I give up… You can have the Wu… I can't take this anymore..."

Jack looked at the cowboy, the boys face twisting with mixed emotions.

Not caring about the small patter of rain or the thunder, he activated his heli-pack and flew off, leaving the chocked Xiaolin Dragons at the mountain.

Clay grabbed the Orb of Secrets as the showdown ended, looking at his friends.

_What just happened?_

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He screamed as he, with all his might, lifted one of his broken robots, throwing it against a wall in his evil lair.

Seeing the robot breaking to pieces, he furiously tried to dry his tears.

_Oh look… Someone's just as broken as me…_

He gave up trying to dry his falling tears, and screamed a ragged scream, hearing it echo throughout the room.

_Never mind, mom and dad's not home… they're never home… not anymore...  
_

He picked up a wrench from his working-desk and threw it, seeing it bounce of a bookshelf with a clang, then fall to the floor.

He closed his eyes, and started to thrown everything in reach against the floor, walls and ceiling.

Ripping everything apart; plans, maps…

_It hurts so much…_

Not caring to hide the pain he felt, he whimpered as he grabbed his hair with trembling hands.

… _So pathetic... I'M SO PATHETIC! _

He sobbed and fell to the floor, hugging his upper body, as he sat on his knees.

He leaned forward, laying his forehead against the cool metal floor, seeing his tears splatter on the metal surface.

It felt like his heart was about to crack, as sobs wracked through his body.

_They'll find out… Everyone's going to know…_

TBC

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**I did it again… I always make him cry… I'VE GOT TO STOP THIS! TTnTT**

**Well well, anyway, next chapter's going to be about Xiaolin monks. Or mostly anyway. **

**I hope I didn't make you disappointed with this chapter, and that my writing's better?**

**It might even happen that I will re-write everything I've written so far. We'll see. **

**I still need criticism though… :D**

**And cookies. Let's not forget the cookies... And reviews. :D**

**// K**


	4. Chapter 4

**No-one must ever know**

**Chapter 4**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the show Xiaolin Showdown… TnT**

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He couldn't possible understand what made Jack act the way he did back at the showdown.

_What could possibly be so much of a pain to hide?_

Clay bit his lip as Jack's face, turning from sad to angry, flashed in his mind.

…_And the tears…_

Why did he ask that question anyway? It made him feel so stupid…

He shouldn't have done it…

Even if the "no good vermin" wasn't all that good, he wasn't evil either.

And seeing the other boy cry with such pain shining in his eyes… The tears made him so guilty.

Clay bit his lip, and looked at his friends, seeing them looking as solemn as him.

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Raimundo shrugged. He really didn't want to feel guilty… but he did.

_That was no ordinary "Jack-tears"… I admit it, that dude can cry for the smallest of things…_

_But never like that…_

He looked at Kimiko, seeing the girl nervously scratching up a small pile of dirt on the ground, with her shoes.

He looked over to Omi. The small round-headed boy looked, with confused and sad eyes, at the sky where Jack Spicer had flown off to.

"I am most ashamed… I should never have asked you to ask that question, Clay…"

Raimundo hung his head as he head Omi's small voice broke the silence between them all.

He saw Clay lay a hand on the smaller boy's shoulder in comfort.

Raimundo sighed and looked over at Dojo.

"Dojo, take us home to the temple…"

The small dragon, still wide-eyed, nodded and changed to his big form.

The journey home was quiet and uneasy.

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Master Fung looked at his pupils, seeing their sombreness, he motioned them to follow him too the vault.

"Did it not go well, my young monks?"

The four Xiaolin dragons nodded, but still didn't look up.

Omi looked up at Master Fung, sorrow and guilt evidently in his eyes.

"We made a mistake, Master Fung… And we are now feeling most guilty."

Fung nodded slowly, and motioned the monks to sit down.

When they all had sat down, Kimiko opened her mouth, and started to tell Master Fung what had happened earlier.

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Guilt was eating away his heart, as he heard Kimiko re-tell what had happened.

Jack Spicer had, ever since he had tried to be good, been a friend of his, and even more so after they had defeated Wuya with his help.

He could even proudly say that he knew the goth-teen the best, amongst the other monks.

_I knew him the best, and hurt him the most…_

He wanted to apologise… to…

He wanted to say he was sorry, and make it all undone.

_But I can't… _

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Outside, the sun had gone down, and the moon taken its place.

Everyone went straight to their rooms after they'd told everything about today's occurrence, and left the Wu's in their rightful places.

"Guys!"

A small whisper was heard through the thin sheets, acting as doors, to their separate rooms.

The three boys looked out of their room, seeing Kimiko standing outside.

"I've given this some serious thought… And…"

She shrugged helplessly, and Omi nudged her on her arm.

"You thought what, Kimiko?"

"… Maybe if we knew Jack's problem, that makes him so sad, maybe we could help him?"

Clay looked deep in thought, as did Raimundo.

Omi shook his head furiously.

"No, Kimiko. We cannot do that. Jack Spicer will tell us his secret, if he feels like it. If he doesn't want us to find out, we should respect his wishes."

Clay nodded in agreement, as he heard Omi speak.

"I agree with Omi. If Spicer was so intent on us not knowing, we shouldn't sneak a peak, and maybe make it worse."

Raimundo made a sound of protest.

"But dude! Clay, we could help him! It was obviously something scary, and we should help him!"

Omi shook his head, sitting down in meditation-position.

"I want to help Jack Spicer, and I think I speak on behalf all of us when I say it… But, we can't really go home to him now, and ask what's wrong."

Kimiko nodded, sitting down as well.

"But we can use the Orb of Secrets… We have to help him."

Clay slowly nodded, and he, Raimundo and Kimiko began walking towards the Shen-gong-Wu-vault.

Omi sorrowfully walked after, looking up at the moon as he came out.

_No matter how I turn this over in my head… It always seems to make things worse…_

_This isn't going to end well… _

_TBC_

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**YOSH!**

**Another chapter. First of all: AHHH!!! DONT FLAME MEEEE!!!!! I KNOW THAT THE CHAPTER WASNT THE BEST!!!!...  
**

**This was particularly hard to make. I must admit... I'm much better at writing angst... becausa angst and rantings are fun...**

**But this? I don't know what I'm supposed to do!**

**Evil characters are easier to write about... Much easier TwT  
**

**As you may see here, all, and I mean ALL characters, are a bit OOC. Sad, but true. **

**I want cookies, because personally I didn't like this chapter. I'm probably going to re-write it. And change words, maybe add more stuff etc. **

**Yah yah, now I will just go and hide under my bed and cry. D:  
**

**// K**


	5. Chapter 5

**No-one must ever know**

**Chapter 5**

**Disclaimer: Don't own Xiaolin Showdown. **

**A/N: Thank you all for your reviews. They make me so happy. :D **

**But sorry for taking so long with this chapter, but I were busy and had a lot to do: Movies to shoot, and radio programmes to make, so the chapters won't come so fast.**

**Besides, I've gotten so fat and lazy because of all the cookies I've got from you guys. :P **

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Kimiko slowly took the Orb of Secrets in her arms, felling the cool surface against her hands. She slowly gulped as she looked at her friends.

_Is this really the right thing to do?_

She shook her head, trying to eliminate the unwanted feeling of unease.

"Orb of Secrets!"

As soon as the Wu's name was said, the orb evolved and turned into a long oval silvery screen.

All of the dragons blinked at the odd sight. None of them had tried the Wu before, and didn't know what to do.

"What are we supposed to do now?"

Kimiko looked at Raimundo as he spoke.

"Maybe we're supposed to say his name and what we want to find out?"

Omi shook his head at his friends, a look of sadness marring his features.

"We should not do this, my friends. It is far too personal, and Jack would not appreciate if we did this. It is most inconsiderate."

Kimiko and Rai looked down at him, clearly confused, while Clay just shrugged.

"I dunno' partner, Spicer looked mighty sad."

Kimiko and Raimundo nodded in agreement to Clay's words.

Raimundo opened his mouth and turned towards the Wu.

"Jack Spicer, deepest darkest secret!"

As the orb begun to show small scenes on its screen, Omi winched but looked, his friends doing the same.

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Jack rose from his position on the floor, and walked over too his bed, hastily rubbing away his tears as he sat down. He closed his eyes as he brought his knees to his chin, slowly counting to ten, to ease the pain he felt inside.

It didn't work.

_It never works…_

Images he tried to forget flashed in his mind, making him dizzy with fear and sadness.

_So many times I've tried to forget…_

But no matter what he did, he couldn't.

Even now, several years later, the images of what had happened were as vivid as if they'd happened yesterday.

How many days had he been captured?

He couldn't really remember… All the days at that time, had floated together and become a whole eternity of hell.

_I wish I could just forget about it. I want to, but I can't. _

He hurriedly crept under his blanket, not caring that he still had his clothes on, then laid his head on his pillow.

_Life's not fair…_

He rarely could sleep, and tonight didn't look like an exception.

Nights without sleep, he didn't care about; he could always find some robots to build or fix…

It was the nights he could, that haunted him.

_All the nightmares…_

He'd even lost count on how many times he'd woken up all sweaty, disturbed form his sleep by his own screams and hammering heart.

_And the sick feeling of never being clean… And the fear that makes you vomit…_

_I hate it. I hate it ALL._

It really hurt. All he wanted was to forget, and live a normal life…

But now, the secret he'd kept hidden for so long…

_It can't get any worse then this… I can't get any further down… _

He buried his head in his pillow, as he began to cry again.

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Kimiko dropped the Wu, who fell to the floor with a soft clang, as the dragons stared at the spot where the screen had been.

She slowly put her hand to cover her mouth, not caring about the teardrops on her cheeks.

_Oh my god… _

Raimundo and Clay just stared at the screen, a bland look of horror and sympathy on their faces.

_I… I can't believe… I don't… I don't want to believe it… I'm sorry…_

Omi looked at his friends, while tears fell from his eyes. He put his hand over his heart, a little look of confusion breaking through the look of sadness on his face.

_It feels like my heart's being crushed…_

Even though he really didn't understand this new feeling completely, he knew it was one of great sadness.

As he looked at his friends again, he knew they felt it too.

_Oh Jack… I… We… I'm so sorry…_

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**Muwaaaah… A new chapter and I'm currently dying from lack of sleep. Too much cookie, tea, soda, candy and other stuff + the feeling of having to make another chapter, is now proven lethal. I am now a "living" (hehe) example of a new weird species called "Ficolists". **

**Yes. I am. Haha…**

**Well, I haven't really done the work I should have done; I've sacrificed some time to make this chappie. (Because lots of cookies and very urgent requests, none the less…) **

**Hope you're pleased with the result. :D **

**And no! There's no pairings in this chapter. :I**

**Ideas, cookies, tea and reviews are, as always, VERY welcome :3**

**// K**


	6. Chapter 6

**No-one must ever know**

**Chapter 6**

**Disclaimer: I still don't own this show. Christy Hui does, and I'm pretty sure she won't sell/give it to me. Sad but true. **

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**WARNING - Mentions of abuse/rape and other offensive material. If you don't want to read this, then DON'T. Please, it's for your own safety. It's nothing mayor, but it's mentioned none the less. You've been warned. Yargh.**

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**A/N: I have to, yet again, apologise for the slow flow (snickers) of chapters. Again I have to tell you that I have too much work going on for the moment. **

**Creating movies and programmes isn't easy! TTwTT**

**Anyhooo, here you have the next chapter, and I would appreciate if you wrote me comments and/or ideas. Thanks in advance. **

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By now, they'd probably already watched it…

… _And know everything about it…_

Soon, they would stand outside his door, gloating, teasing…

_Making me feel even more worthless…_

"Why can't I do something right for once!? Why can't I do anything!?"

He furiously dried away his tears, rising from his bed, and stomped up towards his kitchen.

_I can't go on like this! Sometimes I just have to stand up for myself, even though I'll probably fail. I have to show them that I won't remain weak and hurting forever!_

He took out milk, cereals, a bowl and a spoon. Sitting down, lonely at the big table, he huffed.

_Now, I have to do something. I can't just sit here feeling sorry for myself._

He felt a seed of doubt starting to grow in his pain-filled determination.

"But first, breakfast!"

He forced a smile to his lips, his voice echoing throughout the nearly empty room.

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None of the Xiaolin Dragons spoke for a while. An uncomfortable silence lay over the dark room, the Wu lying cold and untouched, after it had dropped to the floor earlier.

The minutes ticked by, nobody in the room moved or spoke.

All four dragons jumped as the door to the opened and chased away the dark shadows in the room.

"Young dragons…"

Omi turned to the monk he saw as his father.

"Master Fung!"

Fung looked down at the boy as he ran towards him, and threw his harm around his hip.

"… Omi? What's wrong young monks?"

He laid a comforting hand on the boy's head, as he looked at the other dragons.

Clay took off his cowboy-hat and held it to his chest.

He looked up at Master Fung, tears glistering on his face.

"Master Fung, sir…"

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_**Flashback:**_

_He looked up as he heard something outside the door. He wiped his face on his sleeve and stood up. _

_A key was put in the lock and he stared through the darkness as he swallowed in fear._

_He yelped as the door was yanked open, and light flowed in, blinding his sensitive eyes._

"_Hi there little fellow, fancy seeing you here, all by yourself."_

_He sat down, and hugged his knees, shivering. _

_He recognized that voice; it was one of his three his captors._

_His eyes finally adjusting to the light, he slowly raised his head and looked at the man. _

_The man was still in his clown-suit, and the makeup was still on as well._

_The man grinned, as he slowly stepped forward and looked at him._

"_Pretty little brat, ain't ya?"_

_As he looked at the man who stepped closer he froze in fear; it felt as though his heart would burst._

"_No worries. There's only you, and me here… and no-one else. The others are out for now."_

_He shook his head as the man sat down on his knees in front of him._

_He looked at the man, who licked his lips as he looked at him._

"_Let m-me go…"_

_His voice barely audible, as he yet again shook his head furiously._

_He couldn't understand why the man was looking at his so funny. _

_He tried to move away, looking at the door. _

_His only exit…_

_His captor grinned again as he caught his arm with one of his hands, holding his steadily in place._

"_Don't worry pretty-boy. I won't bite… much…"_

_No-one heard his screams._

_**End of flashback.**_

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He landed on the ground and rushed over to the bushes as the memory re-played in his mind.

He tossed up the little food he'd been able to eat this morning, wincing at the disgusting taste it left in his mouth.

The tears that now fell from his eyes, was quickly wiped away.

He gritted his teeth and tried to think about something else.

_Now Jack, be a good boy and think about… rainbows… Happy things… unicorns…_

He hugged his thin frame as he cursed the many shrinks he'd been to since then.

_Stupid fucks… Why can't they at least think of something that __**works**__ for once…_

The rain had stopped a long time ago, but his clothes were still wet.

_Maybe I should have bothered to change when I was home…_

He didn't know what time it was, and he _didn't _care that it soon was dark.

He yelped as he heard a bird cry out.

_Okay, maybe I care a little bit…._

He could see the Xiaolin temple nearby.

_Damn it's cold…_

He cured again, trying to replace his sadness with anger.

Hiding behind his façade, his walls… his mask…

Of Jack Spicer, Evil Boy Genius Extraordinaire…

_I usually do…_

He shivered as he turned on his jet-pack yet again, flying towards the temple.

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_**Oooohh.. I actually wrote a new chapter! OMG! HURRAY FOR MEEEE!!!!... haha that rhymes… X3**_

_**Ahh, next chapter, I'll introduce Chase and Wuya… I think. I cannot promise anything. **_

_**Haha… I'll re-write this as well… I will, I will if you don't like.**_

_**Well, give me criticism. I think I need it to this chapter. **_

_**I wrote the abuse scene as mild as possible!!! And kept the crying to a minimum. **_

_**Well, tell me what you think. It's important. **_

_**Personally I think this chapter was… weird… In lack of better words. **_

_**Ahhh.. gimmeh cookies, reviews and tea, it makes me happy:D**_

_**// K**_


	7. Chapter 7

**No-one must ever know**

**Chapter 7**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the show Xiaolin Showdown. I just watch and drool. Then cry. And long. **

**A/N: I know I haven't updated for sooooooooooo long. And I'm truly sorry! I am! It's just that I don't have as much time to write anymore. This "supposed-to-be-vacation" hasn't been very relaxing, and I've had tons of stuff to do. I haven't even had time to meet my friends. **

**Sorry yet again, for not being able to update. Hope you can forgive me.**

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"Master Fung, sir… We've really messed up this time."

Clay stopped, and shook his head as he looked down at his hands, watching them clamp tightly around his hat.

Raimundo laid a hand of his shoulder in comfort.

Omi sniffed as he released Master Fung's leg and looked up at the man.

"We saw something, that… t-that…"

"We though we could help Jack, if we knew… B-but…"

Kimiko hugged Raimundo, as she couldn't finish her sentence.

"Master Fung. I think this is too big for us."

The Xiaolin Dragons all went silent as Raimundo said what they all were thinking.

"COME OUT! XIAOLIN LOSERS!!!"

They all turned around, startled by the sudden scream.

"J-Jack?..."

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He landed on his wobbly legs, trying hard not to fall.

_So much emotion… I don't know what to do with it…_

"Hahahaha… maybe I'll just blow up?"

He shook his head as he silently talked to himself.

_I don't know what to do…_

He felt the anger and sorrow grow in his chest. Blocking his lungs… blocking his heart…

_It… it's difficult to breathe…_

He hung his head as his vision swam, and fought down his queasiness.

_I'm not going into hysteria… I'm not hysterical… I'M NOT HYSTERICAL!!!_

"… Okay… Maybe I'm a little bit hysterical… ha-ha…"

He raised his hands and pressed them to his face.

_It's now or never…_

He straightened, and flung his head back, filling his lungs with air.

"COME OUT! XIAOLIN LOSERS!!!"

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_**Flashback:**_

"_Stupid bastard! I told you to not rape the brat! Now you could've blown everything!"_

_The apparent leader of the three screamed, and a slapping sound echoed throughout the room. _

_Jack cowered and hugged his bruised body. _

_Silently crying, and not really aware of what happened in the room._

_It hurt everywhere… _

_He silently whimpered into his folded knees. _

"_Why me…?"_

_His three captors looked at him. The leader, with a final punch to the face of the guy who had abused him, walked towards him._

_Jack whimpered and started to shiver. He held his breath as he tried to edge as far away as he could. _

_He looked at the man in front of him._

"_Seeing your beloved father hasn't paid yet…"_

_He paused, and Jack swallowed in fear as he saw the man's face lit up with a sadistic grin._

"_I think he need's more convincing material that we're not very patient people. What you say, guys?"_

_The leader turned around and looked at his companions. _

_When he turned around again, a strange-looking machine was in his hand. _

_Jack tried to stand up and run away, but the pain in his body, made him fall to the floor._

_He looked at the machine, worried by the eerie buzzing came from it. _

_The man turned the machine in his hand, inspecting it. _

"_You know what this is, boy?"_

_Jack could only shake his head as he tried to move away. _

"_You make tattoos with this. You know what a tattoo is? Right, brat?"_

_Jack nodded._

_Yet again, the sadistic grin lit his features. _

"_Good. Now… Where to put our mark?"_

_The man studied him with a cold glare. _

_His other hand gripped Jack's chin, turning his face towards him._

"_Maybe I should mar your pretty face, brat?"_

_At this, the man who had stayed quiet all the time, playing with his knife, walked towards them._

_He as well, looked at Jack's face._

"_Make it look like he's crying."_

_The leader smiled. _

"_Yeah. He is a snivelling brat, after all. It suits him."_

_**End of Flashback.**_

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**Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh… slowly, but oh so slowly… I'm getting somewhere. :/**

**Sorry about the short chapter! And sorry if my spelling sucks for the moment. **

**I haven't really slept in a while. **

**And this equals??? - REWRITE CHAPTER SOON! OnO**

**And I'm actually thinking about having Chase and Wuya in the next chapter… but I don't know…**

**I'll try to update, as soon as possible. And maaaaaaah…. Please tell me what you think?**

**It would make me so happy. :D**

**// K**


	8. Chapter 8

**No-one must ever know**

**Chapter 8**

**A/N: There's no need for a disclaimer. All of you know, that tiny me, cannot possibly own XS. **

…

…

**Damn…**

**And uooohhh, I'm actually on the 8****th**** chapter! And where have I gotten? NOT FAR! **

**Ahhhhhh, I can't forgive myself! … And I feel threatened… **

**Oh! Yes! I'm talking about you! XD **

**And apparently, I'm now supposed get to the point, and write longer chapters. Maaaaah, this'll be a challenge. TTwTT **

**Thank you again, everyone, for all your reviews! They keep this story going! (Slow, but still)**

**Thank you, yet again! **

**// K**

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He rose from his chair, and looked away from the screen, from where he followed the scenes from the Xiaolin temple.

He sneered as he saw Spicer's past.

"Human's are such disgusting creatures."

_I will NOT feel sorry for that insect, Spicer._

"So, there's a reason why he's such a failure"

He called for two of his tiger warriors, as he sat down again.

He looked at the screen again, deep in thought.

"Chase!"

He didn't look up when Wuya stormed through the doors, calling his name.

_Why do I put up with her? _

He massaged his temples.

_That deceitful witch just gives me headaches… maybe I should just throw her to the tigers?_

He though about it for a moment, playing with the thought, but frowned as he felt Wuya lay a hand on his shoulder.

_No. They'll just get food poisoning._

"Jack's picking a fight with the Xiaolin dragons."

_Was it just my imagination, or did her voice shake?_

He rose from his chair again.

"What? Feeling that you should do something to help him?"

He smirked as Wuya spluttered.

"N-no! Of course not! I just thought that if we let him run around, he could destroy our plan!"

He fixed her with his cold glare.

"That insect Spicer won't change anything in my plan. And I don't have time to crush pitiful and useless worms. It's better if the Dragons do it for me."

He heard more then saw Wuya frown.

"But…"

He shrugged her hand of his shoulder and turned around.

"Now move, before I decide to kill you."

He smirked as he saw Wuya shrink back to let him pass.

Two of his most trusted fighters came into the huge room, having followed Chase's order.

_Ahh… I'm bored._

He pondered if he should something about Spicer.

_Might as well... Maybe there's some use of him left._

He grimaced.

_Though I doubt it..._

He looked at his tigers.

"Let's move out."

He started walking towards the exit, his trustful warriors behind him.

He stopped as he heard Wuya follow.

Eyes blazing, he turned around.

"You're staying here."

He felt his annoyance rise, as he saw the witch sneer.

"This is a great opportunity to steal all their Shen gong wu! I'm NOT staying here!"

She started to walk to the doors, but as she tried to walk past him, he grabbed her by her throat.

Lifting her high up in the air, he growled, eyes shining red.

"Don't try my patience Wuya; I'm not in the mood. Try to follow and I'll dispose of you for good this time."

He threw her away, and started walking again.

Ignoring her curses and her cry of pain as she hit the floor, he walked out through the door.

He paused outside of the door, and turned to his warriors.

_On second thought…_

"You two, watch her carefully, and make sure she stays here."

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_**Flashback:**_

_The three men had thrown him into the dark room again, after they were done._

_He shivered in fear in the dark._

'_I miss my mommy… I miss her cookies… I wanna go home. I don't wanna stay here.'_

_His eyes were tightly closed, as he repeated the lines inside his head._

'_I miss her so much. I miss daddy too…'_

_It felt like years since he'd seen them since._

_But it was only a few days._

_His face hurt, and his tears stung as they fell over the fleshly made tattoo._

_It had hurt so much, and the three men's laughter had just gotten louder and louder, the harder he screamed._

'_How can people be so mean…?'_

"_I didn't do anything to them… Then why do they hate me so?"_

_He hugged his thin and bruised frame._

_He hugged himself harder, as his stomach growled._

'_I'm hungry.'_

_He cried harder, wanting to disappear; wanting this nightmare to end, and to wake up, to hug mom._

"_I miss my mommy…"_

_**End of Flashback.**_

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He knew he probably looked like shit

_I don't care…_

He looked at the young monks as they exited the temple, looks of distress as they saw him.

_WhatshouldIdo? Idon'tknow!Idon'tknowwhattodo!!!!!_

He tried to calm his breath.

He fixed his blurred eyes on each of their faces; taking in their looks of shame and sadness, feeling his own resolution crumble.

_They know! Noonewassupposedtoknow!…nonononononononononono…_

He took another deep breath, and flexed his hands into fists, then let them hang.

_I give up._

Opening his mouth, and saying, with more calmness then he felt:

"S-so… you know."

It wasn't a question.

As he saw their expression of shame deepen, he looked up into the sky.

_I can't deny it anymore… they know…_

He felt light-headed, and his vision began to darken.

He fell to his knees.

"No-one was supposed to know, damnit…"

The pain in his chest hurt so much.

He ignored the monks as they with caution, started to walk towards him.

"Spicer?"

He ignored the call from Raimundo.

"J-Jack?"

Kimiko…

"Pardner?"

Even Clay went unheard.

He felt a warm hand land on the shoulder of his freezing body.

"Jack?"

_Omi…_

He opened his mouth; to later close it.

He blinked, trying to clear his vision.

_I hate them… They weren't supposed to know! _

"Why... w-why…?"

He felt the young monks jump in surprise at his words.

He saw Omi step before him, the look of deep shame still etched on his face.

"We are most sorry. W-we thought we could help you… if we knew…"

_Sorry doesn't cover it!_

"Why must you always butt into other people's business?!"

He paused, catching his breath.

"Can you even imagine the pain you've just caused me? Do you even realise how long I've tried to forget about this?! Can you possibly try to understand how hard I've fought to not let anyone know?!"

He angrily grabbed the hand on his shoulder, and threw it off.

"Do you even know how hard it is to live with this…?"

He glared at them, slowly standing up on his wobbly legs.

"Well? DO YOU?!."

He felt the tears tickle in the corner of his eyes as he looked at them.

"I HATE YOU!"

He turned around, and started to walk away.

"Spicer."

He blinked.

_No… not Chase…!_

He looked at the side, eyes widening at what he saw.

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Wuya growled, her usually pretty face was now in a mask of pure hate.

"Just who does he think he is?!"

He rubbed her hands over her aching throat and back.

"If I only had my full power, I would crush him like a bug!"

He started walking to her room, screeching curses all the way, ignoring all Chase's cat warriors.

"He deserves to die!"

She flung her door open, and then threw it shut when she was inside.

She walked up to her mirror, inspecting the bruising on her throat.

Her eyes widened in anger.

_I'll make him pay for treating me like this!_

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**OUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!**

**I MADE IT! (Almost) four pages! It twice as long as it usually is! ooohohhohohohoohoh….**

… **Okay, so four pages isn't so long… maybe I should make it longer?**

**But maaaah, it's hard.**

**And yeah… Hope this chapter didn't disappoint you all. I tried, but I guess it all turned out a little OOC.**

**And no, I didn't make it… There's still too much drama… **

**I FAIL AS A HUMAN BEING! TTATT**

… **aaahhhhh…**

**Well, well. As I've said in the other chapters, I might rewrite this as well. Yah.**

**Now I'm gonna eat my leftover cookies, and cry.**

**Oh, yeah. Hiding under the bed would be a great thing to do as well. I should write that on my to-do-list. TTnTT**

**REVIEW PLEASE! I BEG OF THEE!!!! **

// K


	9. Chapter 9

**No-one must ever know **

**Chapter 9 **

**Disclaimer: Do I own it? OwO **

**……..Naaaaw… I'm not there yet. **

**A/N: Yoooosh, I'm back. Missed me? Okay, those who missed me; REVIEW. **

**Currently, I suffer from a case of insomnia, I forget things more often then not, and I have constant headaches, AND HAVE NO SPARE TIME. **

**Since I've given up trying to sleep, I try to write. One gets the best ideas when is/trying sleeping after all. Since I can't do the first, I do the latter. XD **

**Anyhooo, as I said, please review. They're my write-drug, and no drug results in no writing. **

**AH! I felt like starting to rant about politics, but don't worry; I won't. I'll spare you. :P **

**Ohohoo, but boy, I'm in a ranting mode. The current politics in my country… ::Pukes:: **

**…erhum… and yeah…. Whatever… sorry…. **

**That's how my current situation's like. OwO **

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He turned around, trying to block Chase from his mind.

_Please don't tell me… No, not Chase as well… Please don't tell me that he knows… _

He felt his anger shatter, leaving him empty.

_Heh, well… I guess empty is better then hurting. _

"Chase Young! What are you doing here?!"

Jack stiffened, but didn't turn around to look at Omi's outburst.

"Why I'm here, doesn't concern you, monks. My business is with Spicer."

He heard Chase's answer, but didn't follow up on the rest of the conversation.

_I… I don't want to know… _

He looked at the sky, a small smile on his lips. It had started to rain again.

_Is Chase really here? _

He felt the small droplets of water splattering on his fevered face.

_… So he really is here? _

"Damnit… As if he didn't despise me before… he's got to hate me now. Haha, Jack… Now you've really done it…"

_…. And he knows? _

He didn't know what was so funny about it, but he couldn't help but start chuckling.

_How could it turn to this? I've kept it so well hidden… and in a matter of seconds… everything that took years to build… fell to the ground… _

"Heh… Yeah. This really sucks…"

He could hear his laughter ring falsely in his ears, now noticing the hysteria building inside of him.

He couldn't stop his tears; mixing with the raindrops as they fell.

His laugh continued to grow, coming in rolling waves.

…_hah… I must sound like such a madman… It seems quite fitting really… _

His voice was coarse, and his laughter became coughs, to later turn into sobbing.

"All I ever do is cry… I'm such a cry-baby…"

He stared at his hands, and fell to his knees.

He chuckled.

"They were right… It really fits."

The world around him swayed.

_… Or maybe I'm the one's who's swaying? _

He swayed forward, a world of darkness starting to engulf him.

He closed his eyes, the strain taking its toll upon his body.

He felt the wet ground greet him, and remembered no more.

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He stepped out of the forest, seeing the young Xiaolin dragons and Jack Spicer.

_Ah… what to do now? _

He dearly wished he'd brought his warriors along.

_I have no real wish to dirty my hands with helping a mere insect. _

He shook his head in frustrations, sweeping a few stray hair-strands out of his eyes.

Sighing, as if meeting his doom, he made his presence known.

"Spicer."

_The things an evil man does when bored… It's ridiculous… _

He saw the teen stiffen, and slowly turning towards him.

_Heh, surprise. Didn't expect to see me here, did you? _

He didn't know why, but even though he thought it was supposed to be funny, it lacked humour.

He turned around as he heard his name, raising his eyebrows in annoyance.

_Spicer was right; they really DO butt into other people's business… Truly annoying. _

"Why I'm here, doesn't concern you, monks. My business is with Spicer."

_As I said; ridiculous… What have I, Chase Young, come to?  
_He sighed, feeling his annoyance rise.

"I have no ill intentions against you for now. I'm here because of Spicer."

He saw the dragons splutter in surprise.

"Dude, and why do you suddenly care?"

He stared at Raimundo.

_I don't. _

"Who said I cared?"

_Oh, it would feel so good to choke the life out of that Brazilian brat right now… Or anyone, for the matter... Yeah... Anyone would do... _

"You shouldn't be here."

He looked at the only female dragon, eyes narrowing; blazing red, yet again, as the anger took the best of him.

"Oh, I can see that you dragon's are handling this 'Oh-so-well' yourself. Butting into other people's business, nosing about, feeling good about yourself."

He stared at the monks.

_… Wait… what? _

"Wasn't this all your doing?"

He pointed to Spicer, who had turned away

_…. Am I defending Spicer? _

He massaged his temples, calming down.

"Besides; wasn't it you who said this were to big for you?"

He smirked, as the monks looked down in shame.

His keen hearing picking up a few mumbled words, he turned around to look at Spicer.

He felt a few raindrops fall, and frowned.

_Augh… I hate rain. _

He turned to the monks again.

"Leave now, go back inside. You've done enough damage here."

He turned around, ignoring the monks and walked towards Spicer.

He stopped in his walking, eyes widening a little as he frowned at Spicer's words.

He saw the teen's prone body shake, as if convulsing, as hysterical laughter erupted.

The laughter soon turned into sobbing and tears.

"All I ever do is cry… I'm such a cry-baby…"

Eyes narrowing in anger as he heard the boy's words.

"They were right… It really fits."

The scene from Spicer's past flashed in his mind, making him grit his teeth.

_I've decided; I'm going to- _

His though was abruptly put to en end, as he saw Spicer fall to the ground, unconscious.

He stepped up the teen's body, bending down and gracefully scooped him into his arms.

_… So…. What now? _

Ignoring the confused looks of the monks, he began to return home, taking Spicer with him.

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**AAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA****OH**** YES! AHAHAHAH! FEAR ME!!!!! **

**GOD YES!!!!! I'M BACK!!!!! **

**... With another short chapter… And an even more OOC Chase… TTATT. **

**Gomen nasai. **

**But-but-but! No complaints please! **

**Think about my health! AND REVIEW! **

**I know that sick-days and other boring days are meant for writing, but-but-but! **

**I wanna paint too!!!!!! I'm getting better at it, but I want to get even better! **

**OwO……. OnO…… TTATT…. **

**Nooooo! Don't hate me for not being so fast with updating! **

**And don't throw veggies at me for the bad chapter! **

**AHHH::Ducks under a flying tomato:: **

**No! Stop it::Jumps over a flying cucumber:: **

**No! **

**EVIL READERS! **

**Shame on you! **

**::A angry mob starts chasing me:: **

**AHHHHHHHH!!!! YOU WILL NEVER HAVE MY FREEDOOOOOM::Runs:: **

**// K **


	10. Chapter 10

No-one must ever know

**No-one must ever know**

**Chapter 10**

**Disclaimer: Do not own, yah.**

**A/N: No, I'm not dead…**

**Ahhh!! I'm SO sorry! Please forgive me! I haven't found the time to write. My family's making me work myself to death! With my father, sister and brother gone, I have to do everything myself. It's hard work I tell you!**

**So anyway, I haven't really found any inspiration to write on this fic for a while… And between working at home, and trying to make a manga on the side, is tough shit, if you'll excuse my French. **

**But alas!! Yesterday one of my fav artists on dA uploaded a nice pic of Jackie-poo, and POW, the inspiration's here again! Hopefully it'll last to the end of this fic, which is approaching quickly. It shouldn't be more then a couple of chapters left now, don't you think? **

**But anyway, just so you know that I'm not dead, and that I'm at least going to try to update…. So please don't lose your hopes on me just yet!**

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_He looked up, blinking at the stark light____coming from the other side of the door. A dark shape was standing there. _

_He knew who it was, and he began shaking his head._

'_No… no, please don't…!'_

"_Hi there, squirt. We're all alone again, and this time I've brought a little toy with me…"_

_He looked in horror at the man, eyes tearing, as the man took out a black machine from his pocket. The man pressed a switch in the tiny machine, and it emitted bright blue sparks. _

"_You know what this is?"_

_His eyes were transfixed on the device in the man's hand, fear grabbing a hold of him, making him unable to utter a single word. The man sniggered as he looked at him. _

"_With this teaser… you and I will have lots of fun." _

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His feline warriors stood prepared as soon as he got inside his cave. Roaring out his order to make a room ready, he sneered in disgust and let the unconscious body of Jack Spicer fall to the floor.

"You." He pointed at the closest warrior. "Take this insect and make sure he's dry. Then put him to bed. I want him healthy as soon as possible. The sooner he's healthy, the sooner I can kick him out. Move it!"

_Why did I do this again?_

As soon as his order was out, his warriors began to fulfil his wishes.

… _I hate rain. Now I'm cold and wet. _

"Yes. That must be it. I'm cold, tiered and soaked to the bone. It must be affecting my brain… Making me act this… this weak!"

_Hah... what's next? Saying I have feelings? _

He snorted in disgusted amusement.

"Foolishness. I have no such things."

His train of thoughts was abruptly ended by one of his warriors.

Chase quirked an eyebrow in question.

"Done?"

The tiger nodded with a low growl. Chase dismissed the warrior with a quick wave of his hand; the tiger leaved the room as quietly as it had come.

He turned, and started to walk towards his room, face twisted into a mask of annoyance.

"No use to think about that now."

_My body moved on its own. That's all._

_Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx_

Having dried himself and changed his clothes, he walked into Spicer's current room. Walking up to the chair beside the fireplace, he sat down. He felt a small smile tug at his lips.

Feeling warm and content, he turned to stare at the fire in the fireplace.

_So… What happens after this?_

The inevitable question pierced his mind.

The smile turned into a frown, as he leaned back into the chair in thought. Looking up at the ceiling, confounded with his brow deeply furrowed, he thought about his earlier actions.

_I can't for the world of me understand it…_

Small frightened whimpers could be heard from the bed. The chair he sat on creaked as he turned around, looking at the small form of his annoyance.

_Even while unconscious, he gets on my nerves! _

Chase snorted as he looked down at the sick boy in the bed.

_Worthless Spicer, being even more worthless then usual… Pathetic... _

The boy's face was flushed, and he whimpered in his sleep. Chase felt his eyebrow twitch in annoyance.

"I will never hear the end of this! If you weren't so pitiful Spicer, this would never have happened!"

He growled, and turned around, looking into the fire again.

_I can't believe I've resorted to snapping at someone unconscious! As if it wasn't enough that I've openly showed concern for him…!_

He stilled his thoughts. He pinched his nose bridge, and closed his eyes. A feeling of defeat washed over him, leaving him feeling empty.

"… Sympathy… isn't it?"

Opening his eyes, he yet again glanced over to the boy. His hands fell down into his lap, and he sighed.

The scene of Spicer's childhood played in his head, and the boy's broken voice as he realised that his worst fear had come true, echoed in his ears. The completely, utterly endless look of sadness on the redhead's face, as the tears streamed down…

Yet again looking over at the fevered sleeping boy, that had expression of utter fear etched on his face; he winched.

The small tug of his heart confirmed his suspicions.

_This feeling…_

He placed a hand above his heart, eyes lit with disbelief.

"I feel…sad…"

His mind fumbled with this new information, leaving its master in complete chaos.

_I feel sad… for him…?_

_Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx_

_The door closed, leaving him feeling broken and alone in the darkness. _

_He couldn't remember how many times this had happened… he couldn't even remember how many days he'd been here._

'_Why aren't mommy or daddy here yet?' _

_He whimpered as the pain spread throughout his battered body. The mark under his eye pounded simultaneously with his own heartbeats. The tears that fell from his eyes stung, but he didn't care._

'_Don't they love me anymore?'_

_He dragged himself from the floor, and rested his aching back against a wall. _

'_I'm sick of crying… I promise I won't cry anymore…!'_

_He stared right in front of him, seeing only darkness. Unwanted images flashed in his mind, making him swallow down the bile that threatened to surface. Grasping his dirty and ripped shirt, he sat there; mind haunted, and the feeling of being unloved and forgotten stabbing his chest._

'_Have they forgotten all about me?'_

_Feeling his eyes tear up, he sobbed, and broke his promise. _

"_**I feel… sad…"**_

_He looked up, at the strange voice that pierced throughout the darkness. _

_His eyes widened._

"_Chase?"_

_-_

He blinked, light suddenly flowing into his unprepared eyes. He woke up.

_-_

_xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx_

She swayed her hips seductively, as she approached her goal. She puckered her lips as she looked down.

"We meet again, Hannibal Roy Bean."

Her lips formed into a sinister smile as her new companion answered her.

"Wuya."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**A/N:**

…**. Maaa…. So, now I've sprouted out a new chapter of pure nonsense. If you're not happy about where this is going, TELL ME. I order you to!**

**I've already promised to not turn this into anything remotely close to yaoi or shounen-ai… And I'll try to keep that promise! I will!**

…**. So… Please tell me what you think, I'll eagerly be waiting! OwO**

…**. Oh, btw… Chase might just be a teeny bit OOC… but I just didn't know what to do! **

… **I order you to love me!! HAH!**

**/ K**


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